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Submitted on
May 3, 2008



So many new watchers. Let's talk.

Journal Entry: Sat May 3, 2008, 8:57 PM
  • Mood: Excited

Who IS Markopolio?

A man.  An old man inside, though I'm only 46 on the outside.  Blonde hair, going white, just like my grandfather.  Rail-thin, I weigh in at 145 and 6 feet, or two meters and 66 kilos.  Just call me stick man.

I'm 24 years sober this coming May.  For those of you who know what alcoholism and drug addiction is like...  You will also understand that my teeth was the least of my loss.  I began my sobriety with nowhere to go but up.  

I've recovered from my alcoholism, mostly.  The material possessions were easier than the emotional catching up.  My wife and I bought our home about a year ago.  Small mortgage, and plenty of fixing.  But it's a nice house.  Old.  The emotional hurdles of getting sober are many, and of a great variety.  Turns out that there are many other destructive behaviors than just mood-altering chemicals.  

My wife said I was an artist at heart, and I should try some of my ideas.  So I picked up a pencil and paper and properly sucked.  So, I tried woodcarving.  Not bad, better.  My poetry came too easy, so I thought it must be no good.  Which I think to this day.  Metal sculpture was a bit of a failure, though not terrible.  I got a computer and started doing a bit of photomanipulation, and vintage photo restoration.  Which led me to some photography, and then to stocks.

I wanted to do a work of my grandfather, but had very few pictures of him.  So I looked into doing him in 3D.  Which became my preferred mode of artistic expression.  I'm progressing nicely with several aspects.  Namely poses, morphs and textures.  The actual modeling is very slow going, if I ever get there.  I'm trying to learn more as I am able.  But with working all day, there just isn't a lot of time left in the evenings.

I'm working my way toward retiring from carpentry.  And I'd like to take up 3D work full-time.  That's a goal of mine.

I have a talent for finding things.  Just ask for what you need.  I really can find or produce most anything.  It's nice when I can photograph or render it, but I won't make you wait too long on your art before I start doing searches for you.

I want to say more, but this is probably boring you.  So TTYL!

My Five Stock Rules

1. Send me a note.

I ignore messages on my front page.
Not that I want to be mean. I just never remember to look.
So you may as well not bother.

...Rules Continued

2. Be creative in all aspects of your life.

3. Do what you enjoy, and enjoy what you do.

4. Do your best, and strive to do better.

5. ---This Space Intentionally Left Blank---

1. Yes, you can submit your works as prints that use my stocks.
2. Yes, you may use them off-site. Send me a note with a link.
3. Yes, you may --Blank-- Since you're asking nicely.


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Drusila333 Featured By Owner Jul 6, 2008
You have had an interesting life so far and it looks like its ongoing! I'm a recovered addict myself and I support you in your goal to work at 3D modeling. I'm around the same age as you (47) and going back to school for a one year course paid by unemployment insurance while being out of work. I'll be studying the making of 3D characters for online games and I find myself excited despite a bit of anxiety at having been out of school benches for a good stretch! For a good stretch I didn't consider myself as an artist and thought the title artist = starving and obscure! I don't think I've ever had such positive encouragement since acknowledging that I am an artist! So yeah! keep on truckin!
markopolio-stock Featured By Owner Jul 6, 2008
Thanks. We're all just people here. Artists are a strange bunch anyway, but when you put them together... I haven't had much time to really get into all the 3D I'd like. I'm hoping that I can make enough headway even though I have to work every day. It can be tedious. As for the gaming 3D, you'll need to remember to watch the polygon counts. If everything could be a cube, games would go REALLY fast!
luffsfromafriend Featured By Owner May 13, 2008
Gratz on the sobriety..
15 years here!
over 20 clean...
and yup on the wild ride thingy!
BOTH of my sponsors died a year ago in april- they were both 50 years old...
I will be 46 this year too...
small world eh?;)
markopolio-stock Featured By Owner May 13, 2008
Ouch! It's rough when a sponsor dies. Both of mine did too, though it was quite a few years ago now. And ain't it a wild ride! I never thought about most of the behaviors I was addicted to. I've started looking WAY back into my childhood, to see where I turned left, instead of right. I can't decide which, maybe both. When I watched my father beat my mother with a broomstick, or when my pedophile Aunt molested me. At some point in there, I closed my self off from emotional attachment. And kept everyone at arms length from then on. Nice boy, very polite, quiet child... Which wound up using chemicals to maintain that distance, because it really isn't the natural state of people to not care.
luffsfromafriend Featured By Owner May 14, 2008
i hears ya!
maybe one day will getcha a run down of my history...
itsa long one...:rofl:
short version?
rape, beatings molestation, self-medication, attempted suicides,
numerous undiagnosed ailments...
started drinking rum when i was 10 years old...
quit when i was 30...
i grew up knowing how to maintain a constant B.A.L.-
(blood alcohol level)
yup...alot of the alcoholism in my family is genetic...
never mind environmental...
but the chain is being broken,
by just living it,
and many family members have quit also...
when i quit drinking?
lifes crap hit THE fan!
i STILL am having flashbacks...
and am seriously undermedicated-due to the loss of health insurance several years ago...
but enough!
instead of beating myself up for the progress i have yet to make-
i will breathe easier over the progress that i HAVE made!;)
I drank BECAUSE I AM an alcoholic...
and will hopefully not drink again!
promises can't be made...ya know?
its STILL the first place my brain goes when things get dark...
nice reminder that we will never be cured, and must be ever vigilant!
markopolio-stock Featured By Owner May 15, 2008
Never did the real attempted suicide. As if drinking and some heavy drugs weren't attempted suicide, but you know...
Ah! I had a bit shorter run. First black-out at 13 and hit bottom at 22.
Mmm! I rarely could maintain. I was a black-out drinker.
Nah! The crap was already constantly hitting the fan! We just really started noticing and caring once the drugs drained out of our pores.
I can understand that one. I constantly have this feeling that I need to catch up. That I'm behind in life...
I'm an alcoholic, yes. It beat the living crap out of me. Homelessness in New York City kinda drives it home. And months of living on AA coffee and cookies saved my life.
In my head, I threaten to go back to drinking when things get rough. Yeah, that would show THEM wouldn't it!?! :rofl:
I told my wife to just leave me the minute I start drinking. Because it would mean that I had just given up everything, and was in the process of trying to kill myself. And it wouldn't be pretty.
luffsfromafriend Featured By Owner May 30, 2008
Somedays, actually most days, I'd rather eat a bullet than ever drink again.
But I am day at a time...mostly babysteps...
yup even after all this time!:XD:
Is good to have a fellow alkie in here!!:hug:
markopolio-stock Featured By Owner May 31, 2008
Yep. Sometimes I can't decide whether it would be better to strangle someone or blow my brains out, but neither one of them involves a slow death by drinking poison all day every day. We build a life. No sense staggering into it and knocking it over. :rofl:
luffsfromafriend Featured By Owner May 31, 2008
stupid peeps are mindboggling eh?:jawdrop:
I can totally see myself doing time for a felony-
(yup..still working on anger...)*head explodey*
markopolio-stock Featured By Owner Jun 1, 2008
Ya! Head explodes, either from the inside out, or a bullet. I can't decide which would be better, sometimes. But sober, I think I could get away with murder a bit more easily than if I were drunk. Though I'd probably rather do the time for it. I suspect it would more likely be a killing spree, if I got started. You know how one was never enough... :crazy:
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